Of Fruit and People
by Crazy Cherries
Summary: "You no good dirty piece of fruit thing! What is your goal? Who is your master? ANSWER ME!" It's a sad, sad day, when Hinata is the one screaming at the fruit. Sakura's scared, as she should be. SasuSaku, NaruHina. SEQUEL UP!


_Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto. But I will! Muhahahaha! World domination!_

_This fic is for: Dattebayo4321, hope you like it! :D_

_I posted it before you gave me an answer, cuz, well, I'm mean like that.

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**Of Fruit and People**

Sakura glared. And glared. And glared. Now, why is Sakura glairing you ask, when it's very obvious that's Sasuke's job? Well the answer is a lot less creative then you may believe. Fruit. Yup that's it. That is the mystifying force in the universe that is making the normally peppy, cheery, and eager Sakura like…well like Sasuke.

It had all started this morning. Sakura and Hinata had gone out for a swim in the pond-like pool of water that is very near Konoha. (You know, the place where Jiraiya failed miserably when trying to get Naruto to summon a toad.) Well the girls had planned this trip with TenTen and Ino too, but they had last-minute missions to attend to. (Ha, suckers!)

So Hinata and Sakura were all floating around having a good time. Talking about the incompetence of Sakura's two teammates. (Tweedle dumb and tweedle idiot.) When suddenly out of completely nowhere. Like seriously, out of completely nowhere, as in he dropped in from the sky, comes Kakashi. He makes this huge wave of a splash and then before either girl can ask what the heck is going on, he resurfaces and says: "Protect this with your life. Do not, and I mean **do not, under any circumstances** let it fall into the wrong hands."

Then like he wasn't there at all, he's gone leaving Sakura and Hinata with a platter full of fruit in the shape of…well they really couldn't tell what it was in the shape of. Hinata guessed a really beat up squash and Sakura guessed Gaara's gourd. But the thing was, Kakashi wouldn't even let them ask what the hello kitty this was about.

Hinata sighed, and decided that since Sakura was acting like her crush, well then she might as well act like Naruto. Nodding to herself, she proceeded in freaking the shiz outta Sakura by saying, "You no good dirty piece of fruit thing! What is your goal? Who is your master? ANSWER ME!"

Sakura backed away slightly saying, "Um…Hinata, I think the sun got to you." And before anything more can be said or done, there is a huge splash and a yell followed by a, "Hn." Which can only mean one of two things. Thing one: Aliens have taken over and they have disguised themselves as Naruto and Sasuke and have come to take over the world. Thing two: Sasuke and Naruto are here to completely irritate Sakura because she specifically told them not to come here today.

"Hey guys!" Naruto says, completely oblivious _(A/N: Just like my Spanish teacher!) _to Sakura's glares and murderous mumblings.

"N-Naruto."

"Hey is that fruit?"

"Yes."

"Can I have some?"

"No."

"But why?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

"Naruto!" Now insert a splash followed by Sasuke flipping his hair dramatically to the side.

"Just leave her alone."

"Fine." Naruto crosses his arms and swims over to talk to (bug) Hinata. Sasuke swims over to Sakura.

"Hey."

"Why are you here?" Sakura glares at him, still holding the platter of fruit. Sasuke sighs and points at the fruit.

"Kakashi stole this from me and Naruto. We're here to get it back." Sakura would have believed him, she really would. Except for one thing.

"Really?"

Sasuke fidgets. "Yeah."

"Well then why did Naruto act like he had no idea that I would have fruit?"

"Cuz he's stupid."

"It's food. Even Naruto isn't stupid enough to avoid the lure of food."

"It's not ramen."

"Doesn't have to be for Naruto to want to eat it." Sasuke looked down, she had gotten him there.

"So, what's the real reason you two are here?"

A sigh, then, "I needed Naruto to distract Hinata so I could talk to you."

"Two things. One, why couldn't this wait? Two, what do you need to talk to me about?"

"It couldn't wait because Naruto gave me a pep talk this morning and the effects will fade soon."

"Wait, Naruto as in Naruto Uzumaki gave you a pep talk."

"Yes. Now if you'll let me keep talk-"

"Wow…WAYTA GO NARUTO!" Sakura yells from half way across the pond. Naruto gives her a thumbs up in return.

"Can I continue now?"

"What, yeah. Sure. Go on." Sakura makes a vague hand gesture at him, symbolizing for him to keep talking.

"Thing two kind of ties into thing one. See, the reason I want to talk to you is because I want to tell you something."

"Well Sasuke, stop hesitating and tell me already." Sakura was wondering if she could eat some of the fruit without Kakashi noticing.

"Alright, I lo-"

"Sakura! Are you sure I can't have that fruit?" Naruto asks, ruining Sasuke's chance to tell her.

"No, stupid get lost." Sakura punches Naruto and he lands right in front of Hinata. "You were saying, Sasuke."

"Right, well, see, I lo-"

"And then Hinata, Sakura punched me all the way over here! She's such a horrible person, I'm glad you aren't mean like her." Naruto's loud voice carries over to where Sasuke and Sakura are floating in the water.

"You moron! What did you call me?" Sakura turns a very red color and is ready to kill Naruto. "Here Sasuke, hold my fruit for me will you?" And then Sakura's gone to beat Naruto into the dirt at the bottom of this pond.

Sasuke sighs, why can't I tell her? He thinks as he splashes water with the one hand that isn't holding the platter of fruit.

"Because you are a wimp." Sasuke turns around looking for the voice, his eyes narrowed.

"Who said that?"

"I did." Sasuke can't see anyone, so he thinks he's hallucinating.

"Look at your right hand man!"

Sasuke looks but all he see's is the platter full of fruit. Wait a minute… "The platter is talking to me. I'm officially going crazy."

"Not the platter you dumb-dumb."

"Great now the platter is calling me a dumb-dumb."

"No! The fruit is." Sasuke is very lost.

"So the fruit, which would be you, is calling me a dumb-dumb?"

"You're dumb-dumber than the blonde over there. I helped him out last week and he realized what I was way faster than you did."

"He's an idiot, this kind of stuff isn't real."

"Listen, you want the hot tempered pinky or what?" Sasuke glares, not answering. "You gotta answer man, or I won't leave you alone."

"Fine, yes I want her."

"Good, first step in my three step plan is acknowledging that you want her."

"Hn."

"Step two: tell her how you feel."

"I've tried that! Naruto just keeps butting in!"

"Well then say it really fast."

"Stupid plate of fruit."

"Hey! You need my help so I would very much appreciate it if you don't call me stupid. Or I may just not help you."

Sigh. "Fine."

"Good, now time for step three. You kiss her before she can respond, that way even if she rejects you, you get a kiss."

"That's stupid."

"Whatever kid, just remember this when you wake up."

"What?" But as soon as he says it, he feels someone shaking him. He opens his eyes and finds that he's staring right into Sakura's mesmerizing emerald orbs.

"Sasuke! You're awake!" She hugs him.

"What happened?" He sits up, finding that he's on the edge of the pond, on the grass. His head's killing him.

"I hit you in the head with a punch aimed for Naruto. I'm sorry."

"Well since you're okay, me and Hinata are going back in. Enjoy being taken care of by Sakura!" Leaving Sasuke with that, he jumps right into the pond followed by Hinata.

"I'm really so-" Sakura's words are cut off by Sasuke's kiss. They can hear Naruto dog whistling and yelling it's about time. When they stop for breath, Sasuke smirks. Sakura's red. "Um…S-Sasuke, w-what was that f-for?"

"Iloveyou." He says really fast. Her head shoots up.

"What?" Sasuke sighs.

"Annoying, I love you."

"Oh…I love you too Sasuke!" Sakura hugs him. Tackling him back to the floor.

"Hey, Sakura?" He's totally content with her lying on top of him.

"Hmm?" She's totally content lying on top of him.

"What happened to the fruit?"

"It's right over there." She pointed to a couple feet down from where they were lying.

"Ah, I see it." So it was all a dream, he thinks.

The new couple is staring at the sky when they hear a squishing sound and a few curses.

"My fruit! My magical fruit!" Kakashi has poofed onto his platter of fruit. "NO!" As he sits there sobbing, the others back away from the crazy (old) man.

A few days later, Kakashi is seen giving a basket of freshly picked vegetables to TenTen saying, "Protect this with your life. Do not, and I mean **do not, under any circumstances** let it fall into the wrong hands."

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_All done._

_Like it? Yes? No? Review anyway!_

_By the way, if you're reading **Not a Fairy Tale**, I posted an A/N on why I haven't updated in a while. _

_I plan on updating soon, so don't give up on me!_


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